Will It Matter?
So, to recap: Are you okay right now?
This week, I have a companion question for you to ask yourself as you determine whether or not what you are facing is a calamity or just a blip on the radar of life.
I actually wanted to write about something else, but a few things happened this week that steered me into sharing this with you.
First, this meme appeared on Facebook.
You may recall that one of my library patrons, to whom I deliver books, graciously allowed me to read her autobiography. It was amazing! The plot was full of romance, action, and suspense. She has lived over 80 years and been married about 62 of those. That includes a divorce and remarriage to the man she calls her spouse. She has been the most loyal wife I have ever known, though I gather from reading my grandmother’s memoirs that loyalty and keeping-on despite defeating circumstances were remarkable traits of that generation.
This devoted woman moved so many times, most of the time to find help, because her husband had made choices that jeopardized his family’s well-being. He seemed to do that with alarming regularity in his younger years. That even meant moving to Leavenworth at one point to be close to him as he served his sentence in the maximum security prison while she raised her kids and worked as a nurse.
I’ve met him. They live in the same nursing home. He’s an awfully congenial and contrite man now.
My dear patron didn’t always know how she would support herself. She didn’t always know how she could possibly provide for her children’s needs and wants as they grew. She didn’t always know how to make rent from one month to the next.
But somehow she always made it.
I couldn’t help myself. “Did you ever think you wouldn’t make it?”
She chuckled, “Oh yeah, all the time! But God was always faithful and provided for me and the kids. Always.”
The thing about my child is, he learns differently than our schools teach and takes full advantage of the current you-can-hand-in-assignments-anytime-for-partial-credit rule. The thing he had not fully considered was that grades were due, and that rule was going to be less flexible for these last few assignments.
I felt sick.
In all my years as a student, I had never even flirted with a failing grade.
After I had my own private melt-down and pity party, I remembered the shakily handwritten autobiography of my dear patron who now lies comfortably in a warm bed reading Debbie Macomber.
And I remembered the handwritten story of my grandmother, who was in a psychiatric hospital at one point in her life not knowing if she would ever get better. She eventually was released, remarried and lived into her 90’s, thankful for the gift of each ordinary day.
At the end of each ordinary day, will whatever is riling you really matter?
My seventh grade achievements are forgotten. My grades in junior high have had no bearing on my life since then. Some of what happens in the course of my son’s educational career is his business.
When I read the autobiographies of these amazing women, I am in awe of what they survived.
Heck, they thrived despite legitimate hardships.
And those hardships that brought them to the brink more than once? Even they didn’t matter so much in the end. They were just part of the story.
So, pull back the lens of life and ask yourself if whatever is troubling you will matter in five years?
Usually, the answer is NO.
The same truth can be said for this tasty, rich dinner with real butter. We have this special dish every once in a while and I love it!
A little indulgence every once in a while won’t matter in five years, right?
(Unless you indulge a lot, because then you will need new pants)
Not that those new pants will matter either…
Peace & Light,
The Busy Buddha
FIND RECIPE HERE!
Do you have any tips for sharing this with school aged children who many not have the experience to understand this concept?
How do you model this behavior to others?