The Monday-est Monday Ever!
Usually, I have the Monday Lunch Trio blog ready to send out Monday morning. I do this so you can consider a tasty recipe for lunch or dinner and have something to talk about around the table. Unfortunately, if the blog isn't ready by noon on Monday the Monkey (aka MailChimp, a distribution program) doesn't do his job of disseminating the information.
This Monday, the Monkey had the day off. It wasn't for lack of effort though, I assure you. In fact, it was the result of MUCH effort over two days! Sadly, by the time Monday arrived I had run out of time and resources. The blog just didn't get done.
I started my blog post draft last week. I wrote two philosophical pieces, but they didn't feel exactly right so I set the blog aside for the weekend and opened myself to other ideas. It was a rather trying week - a long dental appointment and a meeting with the school dominated - so I was feeling lackluster anyway. As the weekend approached, I left the pressure of finishing the blog behind and was fully present for a Saturday with my family. I enjoyed the local Farmer's Market, a grocery shopping date with my husband, church with my nearest and dearest and rounded out the day with artisan pizzas, obviously celebrating all the new groceries that were sitting at home in the fridge.
Later that night, as my son researched ridiculously over-priced baseball gloves on the internet, our computer glitched out. The screen was no longer working and there was no way I could do a blog on it.
Sunday, my husband and son decided to head to the mountains. I had a previous engagement requiring that I stay home. After my stint working at the library book sale, I had hoped to get the blog up and ready as I do most Sunday evenings.
FIrst, I set out to fix the computer, but that was a futile proposition. I quickly had to abort the idea that I could salvage our lemon-from-the-beginning Sony VAIO. Luckily, I could see through the static-infested monitor just enough to put my blog essay on an external hard drive. I was so grateful I didn't have to completely start over!
Sadly, the only other working computer we have is a tablet-type mechanism that looks like a laptop but is actually the devil's playground. I'm pretty sure the processor is a hamster wheel that hosts an old, drunk hamster more interested in sleeping than working. It is so slow that there should be a warning and application process for those already in anger management programs to use this device. It's debilitating! However, despite the fact it is useless for our family's purposes, we store it dutifully for times like this when our lemon-prone computer, famous for spontaneous implosions, gives out.
In an attempt to remain ontime for the blog, I promptly took a nap late Sunday afternoon. It seemed like the perfect thing to do under the circumstances. I had to generate stamina somehow.
Still optimistic, I spent Sunday evening trying to negotiate with the drunk hamster in my laptop. First, the notebook needed an updated which generally takes about five lunar cycles. I distracted myself with the season premier of Sister Wives, a reality show about a man and his four wives who reside in Las Vegas. In fact, I was a little jealous to not be in a plural marriage at that moment because if I had been in one, I could have run over to my sister wife's house and used her perfectly functioning computer!
Once the updates were painfully installed, I was able to access my external hard drive and bring up the essay I had started. It was in desperate need of editing, but at least I had a good start. To my chagrin, the word processing program from Microsoft had lapsed. I could see my essay, but I could in no way access it, manipulate it or even copy and paste it!
After much angst, I managed to email myself a copy.
Since it was getting late, I tried to quickly update the homepage of the Monday Lunch website (something less cerebral), but the drunk hamster froze a few times, lost my updates and I was getting tired of starting over. My husband suggested that it was time for a new computer, but I resisted and figured a good night's rest would help.
But you already know what happened. I didn't make it. Despite my intense and furious efforts, I just couldn't pull it off. I spent an entire Monday morning (after a refreshing golf game)editing the essay directly on the website (no easy task), which was slower than a desert turtle in broad daylight, and then it froze and had to be restarted - again. All of my edits were lost just a few moments before noon. I was literally where I had been Saturday afternoon before I started this entire debaucle.
By noon on Monday I had missed the Monkey. I finally gave myself permission to forget it. I walked away, bought a computer that will be just mine, and dropped off the family lemon at the repair shop (again). I had also decided that this week's blog was not to be about philosophical views on the lost art of conversation or why it's alright that my child thinks I'm racist.
No, this Monday is about sharing with you that some days are a bummer. Sometimes, even with the best of intentions, our deepest desires are not achieved. In my infinite wisdom, I just decided that someone reading this needs to know that we all have lackluster days. These days are part of the package. It's even inevitable for people who write about being a thought ninja and teach mindfulness to whoever will listen.
In fact, I noticed that I had been feeling lackluster for the past few days. I have wondered why I bother writing at all. Anyone can publish and write these days. It's easy and at no point has Oprah invited me to Super Soul Sunday. It would be easy to give up and just forget doing a blog altogther, or writing an article, or publishing another book.
Even with awareness, resistance to what is happening can be great. I probably watched too many episodes of a Sister Wives marathon, ate a few too many of the Fruit Slices my husband suggested we get on our romantic grocery run and yelled a little too loudly at an inanimate object.
In the end, I perservered.
I have decided if one person reads this and doesn't give up on whatever seems hard today then it's worth something.
I guess days like this are opportunities to consider how serious we are about something. We could all give up, but that doesn't feel like the best option for me right now. Pushing through a rough day, while it may feel like spreading manure on the garden of life, gives hope and renews resolve. After all, manure is rich in minerals and helps whatever is latent to one day grow into something amazing.
And you know what I had for lunch?
The tomatoes and basil I bought from the Farmer's Market. I happened to have fresh mozerella in the fridge and made a delicious caprese stack.
I highly recommend it when things go south and you need to get your feet back on the ground.
Even if you get a little manure on your shoes.
These healthy stacks are absolutely fantastic with friends and a cup of organic Jasmine tea from Albertson's organics.
FIND RECIPE HERE!
How do you handle a "bad" day?